I sure hope that some of these kids that went missing during covid are just estranged from most of their families. We know that not all of them are, but there is hope that people have just had to relocate and not thought about being in touch with others for various reasons or lost contact info for others. We also know that some are taking full advantage of the situation for either personal or nefarious reasons.
I do too but I don't know how likely I think it is. It is one thing to not stay in touch with for instance a former neighbor, employer or cousin but not be in touch with parents, siblings, and the like? Or one's own minor child...?
I'll be honest and say through the years in my family here and there one person may not be talking to another. There is a streak of stubbornness it seems in some of us women
This has not happened in a long time now but it used to. Our losses have come a long way in realizing what matters most (we always have but...) and some have matured as well. And here is the thing, let's say my daughter was not talking to me or wouldn't take my calls, yes, it has happened, I don't like sharing all personal info but I think it is true of many plus I keep thinking about this when it comes to people who haven't had contact in years in families and have no idea a child is missing... Like in these cases.
So I'm a mom. I have a need to know at minimum that my daughter and grandkids are alive first and that someone has heard from them or can get in touch with them. I feel the same about my mom. My other daughter. My stepson. My siblings.
So in general, not always, if she wasn't talking to my mom, she'd be talking to me or if she wasn't talking to me, she would talk to my mom. And if she wasn't talking to either of us, she'd just about always talk to her sister.
I can only go so long, I at least need to know I'd say weekly at
minimum that all is okay. So I'd check with my mom, when did you last see them all? Talk to her recently? Etc. Or I'd have her sister call her and let me know. If it goes two weeks, then three, I am reaching overworry and four total anxiety...
Now with my mom, we can get in streaks, we don't overworry and are adults, where maybe have meant to call and just not had a minute or gotten around to it. In those cases if I happen to hear from a sister or something, I'll do a "have you talked to mom lately?", find that they have and then say next time you do, tell her I"m meaning to call one of these days soon, just extremely busy right now, etc., etc.
And THEN on top of that you at least text in between as well. Shoot off a quick one of how are you? Sorry haven't had a minute to call lately. Or I'll try to call Sunday. Etc.
Even with these "checks" I need to know someone has SEEN them. I have called a sister in the same town ready to send her over to my mom's if I can't raise her on either the cell phone or home phone for a full day. I have used "ruses" with my daughter in the past, getting her to answer her sister or some such with a call or text that she likely wouldn't ignore... I only resort to that if I really, really need to know and am worried. I'm not intrusive into anyone's life, I just expect to know they are safe. They are adults, they can do as they like but I need to know simply that they are okay.
So I don't get these people... And I understand with different states of residence and all people are different and if someone is intent on convincing someone everything is fine, then they say oh they are at a friend's, oh he'll be back next week or they cover with texts, etc. and people think okay, I guess all is fine even though I haven't seen her... But these ARE the nefarious cases where something IS wrong...
In my case, I'm never worried someone has done something wrong to someone in their own family, I'm just worried that they are not answering, etc. or someone else
has.
So when you hope people have just lost touch with Covid, I'd like to hope so too but for me, I don't think it likely in most "normal" families... There are just too many ways and easy ones to stay in touch these days... In the ones where people haven't stayed in touch, I'd say it is more than likely there is a reason and something is seriously wrong.
My mom pretty much isolated for like a year of Covid. No one was allowed inside. ONE sister dropped groceries and things off on the porch for her and they would talk through a window at a distance. It was very hard, none of us saw her but we knew she was okay. Phones didn't stop, people were on their computers more than ever, etc.
One final note, I am not so much that way with my sisters but I was with my brother as he was alone. With my sisters, we are in sporadic touch, some more than others in touch more often, some not, etc. Each of them though has their own family that worries about them. I love them and worry but I KNOW if my niece or nephew couldn't reach their parents, they'd be doing something. And vice versa. And we'd be hearing from them.
All just my early pre coffee longwinded opinion
